I feel safer when I’m alone. I like to get away, stare at empty tins- something my teachers in kindergarten used to say; empty tins make the loudest noise, is it? I can’t quite remember. But that’s not relevant here. Listen, it’s over 80 degrees outside, the world must be ending. But who cares, the world is always ending, right? That is one of the numerous copying mechanisms this generation has conjured up to rid ourselves of panic. We ask ourselves, how worse can it get? But we don’t really know, do we? In fact we never live long enough to find out.

See I’m a 90’s kid. I grew up in the end of days. I was 8 in the year 2000. A lot of speculation about that, although it was the first time it occurred to me that the idea of non-existence was very real. The disbelief that followed ushered in an age of discontent towards the ancestral paradigms. But then came 2012, boy did we swing to club Wiley. That was years later I think. I remember it because it’s like on January 1st, 2013 the entire world had cleared their browser history, and all prior searches on Mayans were simply gone. Just like that. So if there’s anything certain that I’ve learnt my whole existence, it’s that nothing is ever certain.

Last week, I saw a quote that read ”I don’t want to go to heaven, none of my friends are there anyway.” You can feel that this fellow really took his time- the writer, to explain his thoughts. But very few seem to gather his real intent and/or gravity of his statement. In his words, you can tell he believes in the existence of God, he’s somewhat certain of it, and yet he still chooses to falter. And he affirms it. Right there, the man just wants to be with his friends. Atheists are such crybabies. Do you know how much pain that takes? A lot… none, don’t answer that. It really doesn’t matter. What does however, is the comment I posted- ”Do you know what can drive a man to kill themselves? That much ignorance.” I got 5 likes and a whole lot of mean replies, but I probably deserved that so no offense taken.

Now I noticed that 15k other folks apparently found this quote amusing, I’m assuming that’s why they liked it. In fact, I’m certain of it. Me, I found it insulting. Emotional dishonesty exasperates me. But I still liked the damn update, it’s an outstanding piece of irony. That and the fact that you can’t comment if you haven’t liked the post’s original page.

I love oranges. I have been using that phrase as my go to reference whenever I’m nervous. But the truth is, I hate oranges. The peeling… now that takes care and precision to execute. That waiting, till the outer layer is completely removed. I would never survive such an ordeal. But I’ll take the juice. The point is, fruits make juice… and juice is awesome. Because you drink it. You can be both hydrophobic and still live long enough to survive the crazy cock rampage. And most importantly, take photos to cherish the memory. That’s why we have camera phones… besides taking selfies of course.



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